Except my key point: if I loose my nsec. Almost nobody in the bitcoin community fully trusts their nsec / seed phrase except in hardware wallets. We are constantly told to keep our seeds offline. Marmot solves this for PMs.

lol. so you do know that when you send a message you have to send two messages to the relay right? one for you, one for the other person. in theory you can send each one to a different relay, which decouples this. but if both relays you sent it to have no auth, someone can be sitting there with ...