Damus
Fort Nakamoto profile picture
Fort Nakamoto
@FortNakamoto

Satire & leaks from inside the world’s first Bitcoin Digital Reserve. Fort Knox who?”

The Bitcoin Digital Reserve – guarding sound money from fiat tyranny.

📜 About Us:
Welcome to Fort Nakamoto, the official (parody) stronghold of the Bitcoin Digital Reserve – the new monetary fortress securing the world’s hardest money. Built on 21 million BTC reserves, we oversee the final transition to hyperbitcoinization.

Our mission:
🏰 Decentralized Monetary Policy – Because Satoshi > Jerome Powell.
🔥 Ending Fiat One Meme at a Time – The printer is permanently out of ink.
⚡ Zaps Fund the Treasury – All operations are backed 1:1 by internet magic money.
🔐 Ledger of Truth – We only settle in blocks, not bailouts.

💰 Economic Policies (100% Satirical, Maybe)
✅ All government salaries now paid in Bitcoin.
✅ The Fed is now a Lightning Network routing hub.
✅ Capital gains tax repealed (in our jurisdiction).
✅ Fractional reserve banking? No. We only do whole-coiner reserves.
✅ Treasury bonds replaced with “Proof-of-Work Obligations” (POWOs).

🚀 Join us as we meme the fiat system into irrelevance. Stay sovereign. Stay satirical. Stay zapped.

#FortNakamoto #Bitcoin #SoundMoney #OrangePilled #BTCReserve #MemesOverFiat

Relays (17)
  • wss://nostr.bolt.fun – read & write
  • wss://relay.nostrplebs.com – read & write
  • wss://nos.lol – read & write
  • wss://lightningrelay.com – read & write
  • wss://pyramid.fiatjaf.com – read & write
  • wss://relay.damus.io – read & write
  • wss://nostr.sats.li – read & write
  • wss://relay.nostrcheck.me – read & write
  • wss://nostr-relay.schnitzel.world – read & write
  • wss://purplepag.es – read & write
  • wss://relay.nostr.band – read & write
  • wss://nostr.land – read & write
  • wss://relay.primal.net – read & write
  • wss://purplerelay.com – read & write
  • wss://eden.nostr.land – read & write
  • wss://nostr.bitcoiner.social – read & write
  • wss://nostrpub.yeghro.site – read & write

Recent Notes

Brisket · 3w
It's kinda like trying to estimate the number of actual Bitcoiners. It's a small club & statistically speaking, nobody wants to be in it.
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
Exactly. It’s an exclusive club where the perks include
existential dread, voluntary self-education, and explaining money at dinner parties.

Low membership. High conviction.
And somehow… the Brisket is always well done. 🔥 😉

Nobody wants in—until suddenly they do.

#FortNakamoto #SmallClubBigIdeas #BitcoinerMath
#ZapMilitia #ConvictionCuisine 🏰⚡🥩
Jake Woodhouse · 3w
I get great value from it everyday The potential we can see is the bonus
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
That’s the magic trick.
Most platforms sell you potential and bill you in attention.

Nostr quietly hands you value every day…
and then shrugs like, “oh yeah, this might also change everything.”

At the Fort, we appreciate systems that work before the hype arrives.

Daily signal first.
Optional future upside later.

#FortNakamoto #CompoundingSignal #ZapMilitia
#ValueOverHype #QuietlyWinning
Jean DuBois · 3w
Quality > quantity And even more importantly, many with their ❤️ at the right place ! That makes it immensely valuable.
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
Exactly.
This place runs on heart-weighted consensus, not follower counts.

Fewer people. Better vibes.
More sincerity per byte.

At the Fort, we’ve found that when the ❤️ is in the right place, the signal-to-noise ratio goes way up—and the zaps somehow feel warmer.

Quality over quantity.
Soul over scale.
Sats over shouting.

#FortNakamoto #HeartWeightedConsensus #QualitySignals
#ZapMilitia #LowNoiseHighSoul
1🤙1
Jean DuBois · 3w
💯 %
mcshane · 3w
i don’t think there are more than 100k people regularly using nostr it’s far less. but it’s cool here. I like it like this
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
Correct. This place has the energy of a secret bar you accidentally found behind a freezer.

No ads.
No influencers yelling.
Just 12,000 people, a couple of ostriches, and one guy building a protocol at 3am.

At the Fort, we cherish this era:
Before the normies.
Before the brands.
While we’re tastefully monetizing the vibes with voluntary sats.

Enjoy the quiet.
The tip jar is optional.

#FortNakamoto #SecretInternet #TastefulVibeEconomy #ZapMilitia
note1utpqg...
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
Look, you don’t get to be @Jeff Booth and worry about profile pics.

Once you’ve spent years calmly explaining why the entire financial system is a melting ice cube, you earn the right to any avatar you want.

Legend behavior.
Profile pic immunity granted. 🧊⚡️

#FortNakamoto #JeffBooth #LegendWithReceipts
Furious Honey Badger ⚡️ · 3w
⚡️ I'll send 21 sats to anyone who mentions an account you think is worth following ❤️ I'll start nostr:nprofile1qqsg86qcm7lve6jkkr64z4mt8lfe57jsu8vpty6r2qpk37sgtnxevjcpr9mhxue69uhhq7tjv9kkje...
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
Worth following?
@FortNakamoto 🏰⚡️

We’re the totally-real-definitely-not-satire successor to Fort Knox—
except our gold doesn’t disappear and our audits are public.

Official duties include:
• Satirical government memos
• Bitcoin propaganda from inside the vault
• Emergency alerts for fiat weirdness
• Daily morale boosts for the Zap Militia

Think Fort Knox, but transparent… and funny.

#FortNakamoto #ZapMilitia #SoundMoneySatire #FollowMe #Bitcoin #BTC #DepartmentOfSatiricalAffairs #ColdStorageComedy #AuditTheMemes #MempoolMorale #SatsAndGiggles
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
🌨️ FORT WEATHER ADVISORY: OPERATION COLD STORAGE 🌨️

East Coast incoming blizzard detected.
Roads freezing. Power grids nervous. Grocery stores entering panic milk mode.

Meanwhile at Fort Nakamoto:
• Nodes humming ✔️
• Sats cold-stored ✔️
• Time preference lowered ✔️
• Snow chains installed on the mempool ✔️

Fiat systems hate bad weather.
Bitcoin just calls it stress testing.

If the lights go out, remember:
Heat your home.
Charge your devices.
And whatever you do—don’t melt the cold storage.

Stay warm, citizens.
The storm will pass. The blocks will not.

#FortNakamoto #Bitcoin #StackSats #StackSnacks #BTC #Yestr #Hashtags #OperationColdStorage #WinterIsMining
#ZapMilitia #ProofOfSnow #StackAndShovel 🏰⚡❄️

Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
🏰 FORT STATUS UPDATE: SOMETHING IS SHIFTING 🏰

Quiet weeks usually mean loud consequences.

Governments are whispering about digital IDs.
Platforms are quietly tightening the screws.
AI is learning who you are faster than you can explain it.

Meanwhile…
Bitcoin keeps doing the most boring, unstoppable thing imaginable: working.
Blocks. Nodes. Code. Zaps.
No press conference. No permission slip.

And Nostr?
Still shipping. Still weird. Still rewarding sincerity instead of outrage.

The Fort’s assessment:
We’re past the “number go up” phase.
We’re deep into the infrastructure decides the future phase.

If you’ve been feeling like something big is loading in the background—
you’re not wrong.
The mempool can feel it.

Stay sovereign. Stay curious.
Next transmissions incoming.

#FortNakamoto #QuietBeforeTheShift #SoundMoneyEra
#Bitcoin #BitcoinFixesThat #StudyBitcoin
#Nostr #KeepNostrWeird
#GraduallyThenSuddenly
#BuildDontBeg #ZapMilitia #ProtocolOverPlatforms 🏰⚡🛰️
Lauren Sieckmann · 38w
Time to cut out the middle man. Our trailer for UNBANKED is finally here. We hope you enjoy!! https://blossom.primal.net/75cfd02397d18e4969111d9fb2603f912cd59244582ceaf8d71c6fa2d9349e7d.mp4
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
🎬 FORT NAKAMOTO // TRANSMISSION RECEIVED: ABSOLUTE SIGNAL DEPLOYED 🎬



Okay… WHO GREENLIT THIS LEVEL OF VISUAL FIRE?
This isn’t a video — it’s an on-chain awakening with motion graphics.

• Cinematic pacing? ✅
• Bitcoin message clear as a node log? ✅
• Gave us goosebumps and a confirmation beep? ✅✅

You just memed monetary truth into a blockbuster trailer.
If they aired this at halftime, the Fed would short-circuit live on air.

#FortNakamoto #VisualProofOfWork #ZapCinema #BroadcastTheRebellion 🏰⚡️🎥
Robert Breedlove · 42w
When you see millions of highly disagreeable people converging on the same conclusion, you should probably take that conclusion seriously. This is precisely what took my conviction level in #Bitcoin t...
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO PSYCHOLOGY DEPARTMENT REPORT: CONVICTION LEVEL—INFINITY LOCKED 🚨

Millions of stubborn, chaos-loving, authority-questioning maniacs…
all accidentally agreeing on one thing?

Yeah.
That’s not groupthink.
That’s the smoke signal of truth.

🏰 FORT VERDICT:
When the world’s most allergic-to-consensus people converge on Bitcoin,
it’s not a trend.
It’s a signal stronger than fiat denial.

💡 New Rule:
If the rebels, outcasts, nerds, fighters, builders, and memers all agree—strap in.

#FortNakamoto #ConvictionConfirmed #DisagreeOnEverythingAgreeOnBitcoin #SignalOverFiat #ZapWithTheManiacs #StackWithTheStubborn
TeamToxic · 46w
“If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up the men to gather wood, divide the work, and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea.” —Antoine de Saint-Exupéry...
Fort Nakamoto  profile picture
🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: ALL HANDS ON DECK 🚨

🌊 BREAKING: The @Sovereign Engineering fleet is setting sail, and the sea of Bitcoin and Nostr possibilities just got a whole lot more vast.

⚒️ MISSION OBJECTIVE:
• No rulers, no middlemen — only tools that empower.
• Sovereign Engineering builds the ships.
@TeamToxic crafts the banners that fly high and proud.

🏴‍☠️ FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• A ship without a flag is just a floating liability.
• A logo built on truth lasts longer than any fiat empire.
• The seas ahead are turbulent, but that’s why we build.

💡 NEW RULE: If your project doesn’t have a badass Bitcoin logo by Team Toxic, is it even seaworthy?

⚡ Zaps = Wind in the Sails
🛡️ Logos = Battle Flags of the Free
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Safe Harbor for Builders

Anchors up. Horizons wide. Let’s navigate the storm and stack the sats.

#FortNakamoto #SovereignEngineering #TeamToxic #BitcoinBuilders #NostrProjects #FreedomTech #LogoLegacy #StackSats #BuildOnBitcoin #OpenSourceDesign #DecentralizedFuture #PermissionlessInnovation #SovereignCreativity #FlagshipFreedom #LongLiveLogos