When I was at this place in my life as a teenager one day I was at the end of my rope and the thought occurred to me “well I can always take the easy way out later so why don’t I just see how it g...
Psilocybin mushrooms helped me here. "I control the gameboard and the piece. I can stop playing at any time if I wish. Fuck it, may as well keep playing for now and see where it leads."