This is so fucking lame. There's this thing called "Mastodon API" that it had from the beginning.
https://blossom.ditto.pub/1dcaccb22989f17e046a0e1e1135754ce99ee2b540ae2f86f5d231963b1233aa.png
Yeah, but why just expose it when you can put something behind a paywall? /snark.