Damus
:newt: Zanzibart, forgive me... profile picture
:newt: Zanzibart, forgive me...
@:newt: Zanzibart, forgive me...

Chaos evangelist.
Sometimes evil.
Almost godlike.
Better, even more magnificent than before.
Not for the faint of heart.

:gondola_head: :8b_a:
:gondola_legs: :8b_d:
:gondola_legs: :8b_v:
:gondola_legs: :8b_a:
:gondola_legs: :8b_n:
:gondola_legs: :8b_c:
:gondola_legs: :8b_e:
:gondola_legs: :8b_d:
:gondola_legs: :emergency:
:gondola_legs: :8b_v:
:gondola_legs: :8b_e:
:gondola_legs: :8b_r:
:gondola_legs: :8b_t:
:gondola_legs: :8b_i:
:gondola_legs: :8b_c:
:gondola_legs: :8b_a:
:gondola_legs: :8b_l:
:gondola_legs: :emergency:
:gondola_legs: :8b_s:
:gondola_legs: :8b_u:
:gondola_legs: :8b_p:
:gondola_legs: :8b_r:
:gondola_legs: :8b_e:
:gondola_legs: :8b_m:
:gondola_legs: :8b_a:
:gondola_legs: :8b_c:
:gondola_legs: :8b_y:
:gondola_legs: :emergency:
:gondola_legs: :8b_a:
:gondola_legs: :8b_d:
:gondola_legs: :8b_v:
:gondola_legs: :8b_o:
:gondola_legs: :8b_c:
:gondola_legs: :8b_a:
:gondola_legs: :8b_t:
:gondola_feet: :8b_e:

Infamously brutal #cofe gang enforcer.
#niu refugee.
Programming and tech talk is mostly at @[email protected] (formerly at @[email protected]) but occasionally leaks.
Backup cofe storage and posts are at @[email protected].
Bar-hopping and wine connaisseur posts at @[email protected].
Email is the same as this fedi handle, in case you are a boomer.

I write and actively use proprietary software.

"@[email protected] - quality posts."
- @[email protected]

"newt, a huge tentacled monster, invalidates your pants."
- @[email protected]

"the trick with @newt is that he means the opposite of everything he says"
- @genmaicha

“he is fucking weird”
- @[email protected]

"newt you must be stopped'
- @[email protected]

"@[email protected] The man has a 40 inch penis and there's nothing you can say or do to refute that."
- @[email protected]

"if there was one person on fedi which radiates chad energy @newt would be it, keep it up king"
- @[email protected]

"You must be immune to the autism. True chad energy."
- @[email protected]

"Duke Nukem did nothing wrong."
- @newt

:duke_0::duke_1::duke_2::duke_3:
:duke_4::duke_5::duke_6::duke_7:
:duke_8::duke_9::duke_10::duke_11:

#yestipbot








Ţ̴̧̢̧̡̨̛̛̗̼͇̪̬̣̺̭͔̰̼͙̖̟͎̗͇̻͇̹̼̭̳̗̣͚͓̈̃̍́̿͗̈́̍̍͑̆̇̓̃́̊̋̓̾͂̕͝͠ͅH̷̛̗͈̖̭̬͔̖̰̥̮͔͎̣͚̦̜̩̙̩̟̦̒̄͂̈́̾̂̓̾̆͗̽͂̈́̆̆̏̈́͐̓̊͆͂̓̾̈́͌̈́̒̈́̈́̂̅̿̈́̚͘͘̕͝Y̷̛̜̭̱͔̜͖̩̝͖̹͖̹̥̖͕̺̋̈́͛̊̽̈́̌̐͂̾̿̕̚ͅ ̴̛̮͓͔̺̠̠̠̖̥͔̤̟̤̮̭̰̝̩̫̻͉̩͙̻̤̝͎̜̱̦̞͋̀͋̂̎͆͋͗͐̓͂͛͐͒̐̈́͛̓̏̉͑̎̀̐̉̇̽̓͌͗̅̈́͌͐̋͊̈̈́͗̎́͒̋̅͛̕̚̚̚͘͘͘͜͜͠͝͝͝͝͝͠ͅM̵̡̢̢̧̡̡͖̦̺̲̞̪̭͕͙͚͓̦̱̬̲̪̫̥̜̰̼̤̹͉̼̝̤͍̭͕̝͕͈̥̣̘̫̥̣͍̑̊̊̀͜͜͝ͅI̸̧̡̨̡̫̮̪̠̜̟͎̤̜̦̰͓̖̭̤͉̟͎͕̜̩̤͙̰̤̯̥͔̹̤̠͍̙͕̳͔͓̙̼͕̪̜̟̦̼͇͖͉̭̮͇̪̯̝͍̍̽̆͗͊̅̎͆̃̐̚͜͜͠͠ͅͅN̷̥̺̤̣̠̘͓͈̼̰̭̬̋́̐͛̂̊̄͆̆̈́̒̈̽͂͑̌͑̉́̑̒͗̾́͗̂͘̕͠͝Ḑ̴͕̩̠̼̮͓̪̩̱̟̥̞̊͂͒̊̄̆̉̀̇͌͐̑͐́̕͘͘͜͠͝͝͠ͅ ̶̧̢̡̙͈͚͎̼̼̳̹̗̺̠̗̤̞̰͖̲̫̌̈́̾͐̌̈́̀̃͒̒̇̒̎͂͒̈̅̿͐͒̅̓̿͗͗͑̆͛͋̎͑͆̏̔͐͒̎̅̍̂̉̎͊̇̀́͗̎̒́̓̈́͘͘̚̕̕̕͜͜͠͝͠ͅŚ̵̡̧͇̹̬̝̟̟̯̘̮͓̭͚̮̼͔̥̘̦͉̫̙̤̰̻̺̳̱͙̫͎͖̖͇̀̓̂̽̈́̄̈́̆̐̈́͊͂͛́̎̄͗̀̆̇͊̃́͂͂͑̈́̈́͒̈́̑̋́͛̾́͑͊̚͠͝ͅH̴̨̧̧̡̛̛̛̬̞̳̯͎̦͇̞͈̳͓͈͓̤̼̘̱͈̘̩͎̘̳͈̳͓̫̝̲̟̳̙͎̦͕̟̦̺̖̫̄̋͛̔̾͑̿̌̐̊̋̃́͊̿̇̿̋͋͋̆̈́̌͑̈́̆̂̋̿̍̍͋͗͑̓̀̊͌̐̽̿̚͘͘͘͜͝͝͝Ą̴̢̧̡̢̧̧̢̨̩͚̲̲͓̞̖̣̠̤̰̪̳̩̝̗̗̘͚͕̰͎̱͍̣͚͓̞̲͇̬̫̤͉͙̰̮͕͙͚̯̼̣̦͖̫̘̺͚̌̂̓̍͋́̓̒̏͜ͅͅL̷̨̢̡̡̢̨̛̪̭̣̝̻͈͙̹̠͎̯̤͈̳̟͓̜̬͉̩̤͕̰̤̠̠͚͙͇͔̣̝̯̘͙̰̗̭̲̦̟͕̭͇̪͚̞̻̰̘̹͕̘͙͓̋̈͛͂̍́̈́̄̐̿̐̏̊̋̂̇̽̃͌̀́̍͝ͅL̷̺̠̫̱̍̑̌ ̴̡̢̧̼̼͖̥͉̬̮̥͓͇̼̹̙̟͓̼̣̫̰̘̪͖͚̠̘͙̥̺̐͂́̎̿ͅB̴̧͔͓͓͔̖̝̫̗̯͔̫̗͇̙͙̏̿͐̒͋̒͐È̸̢̛͕̩͖̩͕̹̹̟̜̖̦̜̥̪̰͔̮̭̫̳̦̝̥͕̟̬̰̗̙̳̪̤͈̯̣͇̖͌̈́̍͒̍ͅ ̵̧̧̧̬̜̲̮̖͉̤̠̫͉̱̯̟͙͙̘̭̲͇͙̦̫̲̞̼͈͍͓̊͛̾̀̒̂̏̂͛̋̾̃̇̃̈̋̇̀̐̍̄̓̒̀̐̓͂̑̓̀̉̎͐͋͘͘̕͝ͅĊ̸̡̡̨̨̧̧̢̡̡̨̧̛̛̬̺̘̫͓̪̪̘͔͈̠̳̱̝͕̱͍̘͖̫͙̫̥̘̥̳̦̲͚̙̟̯̝͔̝̼͎͇̹͍͔̥͔̤̙̤̲̥̯̩̞̬͔̋̉͒̊̃̏͐͋͂͊̍́̒̈́̿͋́̅̐̔̈́͑̋͒̎̿̀́̓̐̋͗̈́͒̽̒̓̍͑͒́́͋̒͂͋̆̌̈́̐̍̈́̾́̽͂̒̕̕͜͝͝ͅͅƠ̶̢̛̛̛̲̥̬͇̼̠͙̍̈̈́̈́̒̑͒̈́̏̈́͒̏̍͐̄͋̎͑͗̐͗̀́̃̈̂̈͊̌̍͐̽̀̂̌͊̍̍̒͊̈́̈́̈́̀͘͘͠͝͠͝͠͠N̶̡̛̮̦͓̥̟̙̤̤̤̥͚͖̻̻̗͖̜̥̠͈̺̊͂̋̇̄̔̓́̆̒͆̒̃͗́͑͂̌̈͒̎͋̀͛̾̄̌̀͛̍̃̂̓̂͒̾̄͋͊̅̒͆̂͌̔̀̿̂̌͆́͊̿͂̂̑̕͘̕̚̚͜͝͝͝͝ͅS̸̢̢̛̰͉̭̯̦̟̠͔͈̮̣̜̖͍͔̼͈̺̙͈̒̇̋̀̑͌͆͋̀̒͋̑́̏̌̃̈̌̒͛͛͗͒̎̓̐̀̈́̾̅̐͌̾̀̏͂͛̾͒̈́̀̉̓́̉̾͗͑͒̓͘̕͘͜͝͝͝͝ͅƯ̷̢̨̨̢̨̡̲̟̰̻̱̣̻̤̳̜̲̭̝̦̻̱̲̻̣̯̖̜̪̦̜̤̼̱̯̹̜̤͉̻͇̙͓̤̫͍͓̺̄̃̈͂͗̊̄̀̃͛͐̋͐̈̓̀̑͋̈́̓͗̊̒̃͌̈́̈́̓̃̌̂͛̽͗͛̕̕͜͠M̸̢̻̝͚̣̥͕͈̜͈̗͉͕̹̻̝̲̩̤̖̜̳̬͎̙̲̘̪̬͚̗̝̲̼̲͉̊̈́́̎́̾̓̾́͋͂̓̒͑͋̈́̋̇͋̈̕̚È̸͇̭̭͉̣͊͑̊̈́͐̉̈́̉͗̿̆̃̂̅̎͑̀̏́̚̚͘͝Ḑ̸̡̡̧̧͕̼͇̬̮̥̪̜̞̠̰͕̝̼̫̝̻͔̳̜̬̟͎̟͆̆̓͌̊͒̔̐̇͠ͅͅ

Relays (1)
  • wss://relay.ditto.pub – read & write

Recent Notes

:newt: Zanzibart, forgive me... profile picture
>junior dev at a mid startup
>wednesday morning
>just want to push a minor bugfix to our php app today
>open laptop, check slack
>company group chat is an absolute warzone
>CTO typing in all caps about php2shell
>fucking php
>whatever, server hasn't blown up yet, I just need to get my code in
>open gitlab to merge the PR
>forced emergency logout because of a critical gitlab security patch release
>fucking gitlab
>pipeline fails because of some weird regex compiler bug
>spend 40 minutes fighting CI/CD
>i can just use AI to help debug
>fire up opencode
>api keys nuked because they were breached
>fucking opencode
>i’ll just get fresh LLM api keys from our corp proxy, LiteLLM
>it won’t connect? It’s down?
>look up LiteLLM news: supply chain compromise
>fucking litellm
>cold sweat forming
>slack alert: db connection error
>check our database connection
>we host on TiDB Cloud
>they just announced a security breach, unauthorized access via stolen service account credentials, data copied
>fucking tidb cloud
>full panic attack incoming
>figure fuck it, just ship the container to Railway and go home
>open Railway dashboard
>bright red banner: "Security Disclosure: Rotate all environment variables immediately. All builds paused."
>fucking railway
>try to open the app URL in browser to see if anything is even working
⁠>NET::ERR_CERT_AUTHORITY_INVALID⁠
>eMudhra intermediate certificates compromised
>4
>instantly untrusted by every major browser
>fucking emudhra
>stare blankly at mac screen for 10min
>random pop-up
>restarting in 10min to fix a critical vulnerability
>fucking macos
>close laptop
>leave office
>never come back