Damus
Elizabeth :therian: :cascadia: 🏳️‍⚧️ profile picture
Elizabeth :therian: :cascadia: 🏳️‍⚧️
@Elizabeth :therian: :cascadia: 🏳️‍⚧️
Webscale: a chalky residue deposited on architecture when ordinary software is repeatedly exposed to trace amounts of Google engineering blog posts.

Commonly found on:

Kubernetes clusters serving 11 requests/minute
Kafka installations whose entire event stream could fit in a flatfile or SQLite
14 microservices performing the duties of one medium-sized daemon
Globally distributed databases where all users live in the same state
Service meshes connecting 3 services
Organisations with 4 engineers and a Platform Engineering Team

Removal usually requires a strong solution of “what problem are we actually solving?” and a wire brush.

Severe cases may require application of a harsh cleaner known as Monolith™. Apply liberally until the architecture becomes understandable again.

For deeply embedded Webscale deposits, use PostgreSQL at full strength. Do not dilute with Cassandra.