Shattered Island

Maybe you were destined,
Right from the start,
To fracture, break, and shatter,
My most fragile part.
My unconditionally loving,
beautiful heart.

My tears filled puddles, ponds, lakes
Since we broke apart.
Sailing the ocean of grief,
Looking for land to restart.

Unfortunately there is no fucking breeze,
My trauma response kicks,
Fight, flight or freeze.
Wave after wave of emotional turmoil,
Will hopefully wash me,
towards more fertile soil.

Do I still trust my might?
There is no land in sight.
Did I loose you, because I didn’t fight?
Was my shadow too dark, or did my light shine too bright?

The waves keep rising,
they’re so towering high,
My nutshell is sinking,
Flooded from tears that I cry.

I’ve accepted my fate,
This is the place where I die.
No fairies around me,
Teaching me how to fly.

I’m gracefully drowning,
In the ocean of grief,
Swallowing sorrow,
Until I feel relief.

As my body sinks down,
To where the anemones live,
And realize that there wasn’t much more that I could sustainably give.
I’m finally ready of letting it go.
As I arrive at the gates,
Of eternal flow.

Here I see our land,
Which we would have built.
Both our souls, aligned and fulfilled.

But it only appeared, after I was ready to die.
The waves reappear.
And I am starting to cry.