My parents had money, but I began working at 13, opening an IRA at 15, tithing 10%, and putting money away for 27 more years at my dad’s direction. College tuition was paid for, but that was it. Everything else has been on my own, and I refused any help with a down payment. I view my upbringing as a fantastic balance of what you are talking about. It’s very doable, and I learned the lessons of hard work, saving, and giving at a young age. His grandkids will get the same education.