Damus
royster⚡️ profile picture
royster⚡️
@royster
Bitcoin Black Mirror: not a prediction or financial advice, this is for entertainment purposes only

Bitcoin moons to 690,420 cuck bucks, the FED pulls the liquidity rug. Jerome starts QT’ing to the max as congress balances the budget. Banks fail, grandmas retirement goes poof, they let loose the hounds of media propaganda. Bitcoin is blamed for financial crisis 2.0.



 On Friday the 13th 13% of us get black bagged and deposited in the nearest volcano while the rest of y’all get sent to the gulag for forced labor (hand knitting rainbow colored polyester covid face masks for dogs).

Meanwhile they 6102 the ETFs and close all on-ramps while criminalizing math and other stuff. 

As the price nukes, Peter Schiff and Kramer both flip bullish at the same time thus condemning humanity to 1000 years of darkness.


The cascading collapse continues apace.

@ODELL gets a haircut and starts buttoning all his buttons.
@jack starts showing emotion on a daily basis.
Craig Wright is recognized as the world’s foremost expert in samurai sword fighting. @Change this if you want and @UNCLE ROCKSTAR are his two star pupils and become bitter rivals as the vie for his attention and praise.
@Gigi changes his name to Ffs and forsakes his green suit for his birthday suit. Privacy be damned.
@Lyn Alden and @preston start a paid group offering inside scoops on the next hot NFT project.
@Jeff Booth starts a hot air balloon tourism company as he daily extolls the benefit’s of inflation to the masses.
@HODL goes back to school for an MBA and becomes an accountant. 

@Erik Cason runs for office.
@yellow's fuzzy hair falls out revealing that his skin is actually green. He stops believing.

@DETERMINISTIC OPTIMISM 🌞 starts making calculators.

@PABLOF7z stops working altogether.
@Marty Bent finally starts zapping but no one cares.
@jb55 and @fiatjaf get jobs at Facebook and really enjoy the free lunches and other perks.
@BTC Sessions pivots to making videos explaining how to pair your wifi printer to your laptop over tor.
@Ben Justman🍷 renounces Creed and starts brewing kombucha
.
@awayslice goes vegan.
@Parker Lewis is the last daily active user utilizing nostr



The world gradually then suddenly slips into the abyss and a million years later aliens are befuddled at the only remains of a brief dream of a bright orange future:

a stash of 21 bright orange plastic hand grenades with a strange symbol on them buried in what used to be @CryptoCloaks™ backyard with a bunch of random words inside…
2212❤️29🤙10😂6🔥4💜2🧡2
unknown · 103w
What ever you are taking I need double of.
QW · 103w
Wait… the Cold Card ISNT a Calculator? 🤯
vectr · 103w
All except CW, who >claims< to be the king of Samurai, but has only demonstrated skills with a pool noodle
marventus · 103w
That’s…just savage man.
Ryan · 103w
The pairing your WiFi printer to your laptop over tor was the best part of that lmao
Ben Justman🍷 · 103w
see you in the gulag brother
milkpaste · 103w
Best Nostr note I've ever read, fkn lol
Change this if you want · 103w
What the heck I just read 😁
HODL · 103w
I’d have to go back to undergrad first because I dropped out of college lol 😂
cynic · 103w
You might catch me in the gulag playing GTA7 for one hour as my reward after putting in a solid 12 hour prison work day on the bike-crank generator for the gulag bitcoin miners. #bitcoin https://image.nostr.build/835a61754021d18da0cd76e85de41bf46c58052b23413eb20055cc450ae3df1a.jpg
BitcoinSandy · 103w
Sounds feasible 🤙😂
Matt 🛸 · 103w
I did some calculations and this adds up. Good prediction.
nobody · 103w
Funny!🤣
bevo · 103w
Very funny. I have had trouble pairing printers to computers for 30 yrs. It’s one of life’s great mysteries. nostr:npub1rxysxnjkhrmqd3ey73dp9n5y5yvyzcs64acc9g0k2epcpwwyya4spvhnp8 does not stand a chance
teta Θ · 103w
An ironic entertainment that can become our reality if we mistakenly decide that the color of our freedom is red. This is not a joke or entertainment, this is serious, friends. If we don't fight, we will be burned at the stake like heretics during the Inquisitions. Fight and conquer!
Chris Alaimo · 103w
😂😂😂
Justin · 103w
Wen screenplay?
DRE · 103w
Marty starts zapping but no one cares 🤣💀
Kontext · 103w
OK bro So what's the trade?
Mike - Eater of Steak · 103w
Come on man. No way nostr:npub153xmex42x4chdf757hp3q6zxagykkek7pdgwuwd074964dkyha9s82ryu8 ever renounces Creed. Not even in your Black Mirror universe.